Thursday, June 24, 2010

Real Men Like Real Hair – Why Weaves Don’t Work


Anslem “NWSO” Samuel’s Naked With Socks On is an award-winning relationship blog. Each week, NWSO will share his candid thoughts on women, love, life and all the fun stuff in between with MadameNoire.

If you pay attention to the images portrayed in magazines and mainstream movies, most will have you believe that all men are stuck on the idea of their women having long hair. Whether it’s Beyoncé or Tamika up the block, achieving that look usually means getting a weave, tracks, wig, or whatever other follicle trickery beauticians use to fake the funk. That’s not to say that a black woman can’t have naturally long hair without assistance, but more times than not that sister with the ponytail is actually rocking a phony tail.

I for one am a man that appreciates natural hair. Be it locks, an Afro, curly tresses or even a low-cut Caesar, I admire a woman that is comfortable in her own skin and hair. There’s just a certain sexiness and confidence I get from a woman that decides to defy the norm by rockin’ the hair God gave her. Again, that’s no knock against sisters that prefer a perm and extensions, but natural hair is more my speed. But maybe I’m alone in that distinction.

Mainstream media beats us over the head with images of longhaired women being the ideal form of beauty. From childhood ideas of beauty that defy our own African heritage are what we’re exposed to. Our daughters grow up playing with Barbie dolls that have silky smooth hair and watching cartoons that highlight the same features. Somewhere along the way our sons learn early on to pay more attention to the girls with “good hair.” A few parents make a concerted effort to teach their kids diversity, but for the most part we all wind up repeating the same cycle.

Young girls grow into women that can’t wait to get their hair did and balk at the idea of getting caught in the rain for fear of reverting back to their “nappy” roots. Young boys grow into men that chase short skirts and long hair for sport. As a result, black hair care is a multi-billion dollar industry, where perms, weaves and wigs are the norm. Even women that sport short cuts, like Rihanna and Halle Berry, are guilty of layering their tresses with tracks and extensions, while most guys are clueless.

Essence.com Beauty Editor Tia Williams recently hit the streets of Harlem, NY to see is men could tell which celebrities had long African-American hair or weaves. Needless to say, the ladies had the brothers fooled. Truthfully, the average man probably can’t tell the real from the fake with hair (or anything else for that matter) unless a woman is wearing an extremely bad weave.

All we care about is whether or not a woman can treat us as good as she looks. Now that’s real

—Anslem “NWSO” Samuel

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